saturday

It's the first time I have been by myself, alone, in almost two days. Yesterday was a brilliant, wonderful day filled with brilliant wonderful people, but sleep was a relief in that I could finally shut down and not have to interact. Today I bounced from shopping w/ Ninn for bass player clothes, to choir rehearsal, and finally to the theatre where I am the front of house manager. I am in the otherwise unoccupied office right now, trying out the new internet connection. Wireless, my dears, is the greatist thing since the gold sequined shoes I caved into yesterday.

Yesterday Nina came over for tea which turned into dinner, and, while manger-ing on baguette and cheese and pate we talked for hours. About boys. Because, really... what else is there to talk about? Obviously the various males in our lives are the center around which we orbit. Of course it is necessary to spend hours discussing the inner workings of their brains. We have to learn to put ourselves in their positions, understand things from their perspectives: then it will all make sense. Really. How else could it work?

Or not. Forgive the cyanide laced sarcasm of the previous paragraph, it's been a rough few days on the XY chromosonal front. My own particular relationship is not the one at issue (things there are lovely, he skates like a deamon, makes me laugh, and is learning not to take my insanity personally) but some of my closest friends seem to be constantly evaluating and re-evaluating the status of their relationships. It is tiring to listen to, and must be more tiring to keep up on a daily basis. I wonder where the urge to have things be perfect comes from? And the lack of patience for things to work themselves out in a timely fashion?

Maybe it's our ages: early 20's are not known to be humanity's most rational years. Maybe it is the immediacy of communication: it's easier to react without thought when we can pick up the phone and leave angry voice mails or fire off stinging emails. Maybe we so desperately want to know that things will turn out alright that we are willing to lose sight of the current to focus on a distant fuzzy version of a future.

Mostly, I think we all need a good dose of perspective.